Sunny Side Up! is a place for me, a gal who is 21 years of age and unanimously recognized in her tiny universe as an 'old soul', to store a few of my favorite things & to share them with new and (hopefully) friendly individuals.
1.) The adorable Nate, the guy who picks me up from that transportation service, took hold of my hand yesterday so, we held hands all the way to my destination. 2.) I got a delivery from UPS today. 3.) I now own a pair of the coveted cat eye sunglasses. 4.) I've finally found a new exercise that gets at my pesky thighs. 5.) I might get to meet one of my favorite Internet friends while staying in Georgia!
1.) I was fortunate enough to see the revival of South Pacific last saturday and it was AMAZING. 2.) I lost a library book on that trip but, I went to buy books today & came across the same novel that I misplaced for .49 so, hopefully I won't have to pay a penalty because, I've replaced it! 3.) I took Whitey, my dog, for a walk today and he listened extremely well once the initial excitement wore off. 4.) I'm drinking anywhere from 20-80 ounces of water a day now and I think its helping me lose weight. 5.) Blackberries on sale 10 packs for $10.00? SWEET.
*DISCLAIMER*I know that the three or four of you who read this humble little blog come here for some happy escapism however, I am currently dealing with the loss of without a doubt, the biggest friendship I have ever known and, being that I have no one to pour over this with me in the physical sense, I am bringing it here in the form of a recap, per se. Please, bare with me.
I remember the first time I saw her. It was in Chorus and she was sitting beside my other good friend. She was wearing a purple flowered dress and glasses. The dress brought ridicule from some popular peers beside me because it was not, admittedly, anywhere near the style that was universally popular that school year of 1999-2000. Of course, that didn't phase me because from the start, I could sense that here was a gentle, caring soul, a comrade of sorts and also; to be blunt, I myself was not a fashion plate or a particularly superficial being so, one's attire has never determined whether or not I choose to befriend an individual.
I was not threatened by this gawky girl, she didn't give me that 'holier than thou' side eye that since first grade, I had become so accustomed to. And so, I did something which was completely out of character for the shy, embarrassed human that I was, I said hello and smiled at her. Without any reservations, that's what I did and, do you know what happened? She, too, said hello and SHE SMILED AT ME IN RETURN.
That's all it took, I was off. I was bound to make this unknown creature my friend but, I needed to know her name first so, I asked this mutual friend beside her, Jennifer, who she was. "Her name is K." Jen said.
"Hi, K. I'm Krista." "Hi, Krista." and from there, conversation flowed unabashedly.
We now had someone to sit with at lunch and we'd get our trays and head to our own little corner to sit across from one another and talk and giggle about boys or how Ms. R sat on the edge of her desk that morning with textbook in hand, only to have the whole kit-n-kaboodle collapse beneath her weight, leaving all of her pupils, whether or not they had actually witnessed this most comical occurrence, to laugh and joke with one another for the remainder of the school day. We exchanged numbers and with that information gathered, we were now left to talk to one another constantly, annoying our mothers with tied up phone lines.
We stayed at one an other's homes, with me staying on so long at hers one summer that my mother actually asked me to return to my own house because she missed me! Our parents shuttled us to and from amusement parks, movies, and one infamous fire hall dance where, lacking parental supervision at the tender ages of 13 and 15, we dirty danced for a cigarette a piece, and smoked those suckers with pride despite the fact that I had no clue one was supposed to inhale after taking a drag so, I just nonchalantly sucked in and blew out absolutely nothing which means I didn't look 'cool' for long. It didn't matter though because, we were together so, everyone else's opinions were disregarded and cancelled out.
I was with her throughout her many failed first attempts at romantic relationships, with myself lagging behind in that department for many years. I stood beside her when that evil excuse for a human molested her using the guise of a father figure to lure that young, naive mind into consenting to lewd acts. I was her saving grace throughout a trial that lasted two in a half years that was brought to a close in the best way imaginable due almost solely to my testimony as to what exactly it was that I myself had witnessed. We were both terrified but, we made it because we had each other and again, no one else mattered.
Somewhere in the midst of our shared journeys through the typical adolescent rebellion stage, a new, surprising, completely unexpected emotion was taking root inside of me. I was falling in love with my best friend. I was in love with my best friend who was, God forbid, of the female persuasion also and, having been raised in a conservative "Christian"* household, in the beginning I tried to deny it because hey, nobody wants to go to hell, you know? However, after some introspection and exposure to diversity and acceptance through various Internet sites, etc., I accepted and embraced this new development. I just had to gather up the courage to tell K my feelings.
One evening, at a restaurant, I spilled the beans. It was rather easy because the two of us were incredibly open with each other anyway, (after that trial, it was ridiculous to be prudes when it came to what we could and could not speak openly about.), so there was no tension even though of course, I was nervous I wouldn't deny that. It turned out that, she, too, had feelings for me and so, a whirlwind intimate relationship began.
That evening, we explored one another with ardor and tenderness. I was smitten and I thought she was in return. In actuality, our sexual relations lasted less than two months because, as it turned out, as much as she loved me as a best friend and sister, she had really only been curious and a lot of best friends tend to 'play around' sexually at an age when hormones are flowing through their puberty ridden bodies like water from a stream and, in this sense, K was no exception.
My love and devotion lasted for years after our short lived affair and I often told her that I loved her however, I only alluded to the actual capacity of that love but, she knew how I felt and she would automatically return that statement but it went without saying that her love for me did not run quite so deep as mine.
In 2004, she met J and, that was the beginning of the unraveling of our sisterhood, I suppose. I then moved back to Georgia as I had before during the course of our friendship but, up until J entered the picture, this had never put a damper on our deep seated relationship. Within three months of meeting him and his deranged (that's the most polite way to put it), family, he had gotten her pregnant. Two or three weeks after that revelation he proposed and a month or two later, they were married.
K's first child was born prematurely at 29 weeks. I had returned from Georgia and had traveled with her mother and mother-in-law to Pittsburgh to be with her for the birth. We arrived an hour late and the baby was already in the NICU. A, her baby, survived and due to K and J's prominent involvement with Child Youth Services, was later adopted by her aunt.
Now, throughout k's long tenure in Pittsburgh, which is two hours away, our relationship was tested because J was very jealous of me due to the fact that K felt that because he was her husband, she needed to tell him EVERYTHING about her past but, of course, this did not go both ways. I will readily admit right here that yes, at that time, I was still in love with K however, I knew my place and I was in no way attempting to sabotage their marriage because I really wanted K to be happy and I was happy just to be the best friend in that scenario.
K became pregnant again not long after returning from Pittsburgh. I often took it upon myself to open my mouth and tell her that certain things were not a good idea because previously, that is how we had been with one another and, this often started bitter arguments with J and I.
I hated J, (I still do), he is truly a deadbeat in every sense of the word and I am not exaggerating. I'll leave it at that but, keep that in mind.
Within the next two years, K had another girl and not long after that, a little boy. The second child was taken by CYS and put into foster care after I myself had fought to have her at the age of 18 and, I almost was granted guardianship but due to circumstances beyond my control, at the last minute I was denied.
J began acting extra friendly with me after they had moved out of her mother's house. One evening, when he was taking me home after a day spent with K, he pressured me into a sexual situation before he would drop me off. After that occurred, I distanced myself from K, only speaking to her on the phone for months.
When K became pregnant with her fifth child, (she had a miscarriage a few months before), things were going well between them and I was comfortable visiting her every so often with my mother picking me up afterward. Near her 33rd week of pregnancy, his mother came to get the rest of her belongings to move down to Georgia in a U-Haul. J, having no driver's licence, insisted that he was driving that truck down there for her. K knew no argument she could make would convince him otherwise and so, to prevent a monumental blow-up, she protested very little. After approximately a week of his being gone, he called her one day claiming that he had been unhappy for months and that he no longer loved her and from there, with K being on bed rest due to her history of pre-term labor, I semi took over, helping her with the two toddlers already in her care.
T was born on Good Friday at 36 1/2 weeks. I visited the two of them the next day. T is a breathtakingly beautiful baby with a full head of hair and a calm, gentle personality.
A few days after they came home, after not speaking to J, he texted K asking to speak to her. At this point, I knew that just like the two previous 'breakups' he was dying to come back. My suspicions were right on the money and he will be back as fast as his mother can gather the money to send him back on a bus.
K swears that she is not taking him back, he's only coming up here to be close to his children; yadda, yadda, yadda. I know without a doubt, the moment he steps off that bus, she'll be back in his arms again. So, that is why after surprisingly very little soul searching, I am removing myself from the picture completely. This, I truly feel, is the healthiest thing for me to do. I cannot deny how difficult and heart wrenching this decision is for me after nearly a decade of laughter, tears, hugs and babies but, for my own mental health (and physical, obviously) its what must be done.
And so, to K I say, thank you for this incredible relationship. Thank you for accepting me for who I am and loving me despite that fact. I'll always remember the good and when I'm sad or lonely, those memories we've created through the years will be like a blanket to wrap around myself to ward off the bitter cold of life's most difficult times. In my own, quiet way, though its different now, I love you and I always will.
I've heard it said, That people come into our lives for a reason, Bringing something we must learn. And, we are lead to those who help us most grow, If we let them, And we help them in return.
Well, I don't know if I believe that's true, But, I know I'm who I am today because I knew you.
Like a comet pulled from orbit; as it passes the sun, Like a stream that meets a boulder; halfway through the wood, Who can say if I've been changed for the better; I do believe I have been changed for the better, Because I knew you, I have been changed FOR GOOD. For Goodfrom Wicked
1.) Getting unexpected calls from my BFF, Heather just when I need it the most. 2.) Classic television theme songs. 3.) Postcards from far away places. 4.) My Carnival dress from ModCloth . 5.) His Girl Friday .
1.) Getting better after being sick for nearly a week. 2.) Small cups of cherry vanilla cappuccino. 3.) Sitting on those giant exercise balls. 4.) Anticipation of taking my first trip alone in June. 5.)Happy music of any kind.
1.) Kisses given to me by small children. 2.) Grapes. 3.) The Andy Giffith Show in the evening. 4.) The name Lissette. 5.) Finding new and lovely blogs to explore late at night.
I'm back. I'm upset and hurt right now. I don't want to get into it because nobody wants to hear depressing things from a stranger when we all have our own problems, right?
So, to cheer myself and perhaps, a few of you; I present the third of my favorite movie moments, brought back with a vengeance thanks to a little reminder over on FABULON .
A cute little number with some very swell dancing performed by three amazing entertainers; Donald O'Connor, Debbie Reynolds, and Gene Kelly; who coincidentally, had family members in my small town, I give you:
1.) Children. 2.) The cutie who has been picking me up after therapy the past two times I've gone and the fact that he's shamelessly flirting with me. 3.) The fact that I've been so inexplicably happy lately. 4.) The black tshirt I'm wearing today. The one with all of the musical logos I bought at that Broadway shop last year. 5.) Anticipation of seeing my second Broadway production; South Pacific.
1.) Speed walking on trails on fairly nice days, keeping pace to the beat of the song eminating from my MP3 player. 2.) New listeners on blip.fm. 3.) Chicken salad made with red leaf lettuce, with basalmic vinegarette and a few teaspoons of smoky horseradish mixed in for good measure. 4.) Lists, of anything at all. 5.) Writing new, comprenshive "About Me" sections on new websites I join.
1.) Even when we have gone without talking for months at a time, my Heatherface and I can just pick up right where we left off. 2.) I'm very lucky to be able to put even a small amount of money back for the trips I want to take this year. 3.) I now have a wonderful friend who resides in California so, that gives me the perfect excuse to go there like I've wanted to for years. 4.) I'm so happy that I paid my library dues so now I have more incentive to finish one book so I can go on to the next in line. 5.) Ice Breakers new berry flavored Ice Cubes gum.
1.) The day after one of my brother's get togethers when all of his friends go home. 2.) Mondays. 3.) Trips to the library, coming home with seven books to dive into. 4.) When my dog howls for me just because I'm next door for a few minutes. 5.) The fact that I continually get compliments about my diverse music taste over at blip.fm .
1.) The smell of gasoline, in small doses anyway. 2.) The scent of freshly blooming lilacs on a warm, sunny spring day. 3.) A newborn baby's breath. 4.) The smell of something with garlic as a main spice being cooked. 5.) The special aroma of perfume, cooking, and all good things that associates itself with my mother.
1) After what I found out today, I'm very greatful for my generally good health. 2) Oh. My Lord. Blip is my newest obsession & I'm pretty sure that it will always be in my top ten favorite Internet places. 3) I fucking LOVE hula hooping in my bra and panties, the frilly ones that are black with pink edging. 4.) When people that have been MIA from my group therapy turn back up. 5) The guy who drives me to my therapy sessions through thiat transportation service. He's a sweetie. I wish he was my dad.
If I were Jessica, I would not pay any mind to what people are saying about her hot, curvy figure. However, I would consider firing my stylist. Those mom jeans are atrocious and to my mind, animal print is NEVER a good choice. EVER. Otherwise, yay for a healthy woman in Hollywood!
1. I have a movie to keep me occupied this evening, Fiddler on the Roof to be exact. (TCM at 8 EST. in case you too are interested.) 2.) I got a valentine in the mail today from my sister and nephews. 3.) I went to the gym four times this week, not quite my goal but damn close. 4.) All of this working out pays off. My arms are getting muscle definition, my legs are muscle packed, and my stomach is shrinking. 5.) I now have not one but TWO dresses headed my way.
1.)Burning a ton of calories in just over half an hour. 2.) Homemade bread with soup. 3.) My mother will be returning my credit card tomorrow. 4.)At which time I shall begin my spring wardrobe with a Summer in the City Romper. 5.)New friend requests on Last.FM.
1.) I finally got a hula hoop today. (Last one too!) So, I'm going to teach myself that to add a bit of fun variety to my exercise routine. 2.) I got that paper to fill out and send to Harrisburg requesting my GED transcripts so, after that's done, I'll be all set to apply for college! 3.) My mother was in a bad mood today and instead of snapping back, I stayed calm and told her she was hurting my feelings. She apologized. 4.) I finished Wonderland and started Revolutionary Road. 5.) I made someone vey happy today by offering a sincere compliment.
Ahhhh. Today is one of those days, you know? A day where its damn near impossible to find grace in anything. However, here we are:
1.) I love how every time I go near my dog Whitey, he stands on his hind legs and 'reaches' for me with his front paws. 2.) I love the tangy, minty fresh feeling that toothpaste leaves in my mouth after I'm finished brushing. 3.) I like how the above statement starts out sounding like one of those commercials for Orbit gum. 4.) I like finding surprisingly enough, really good movies on On Demand's Free Movie section to watch because, television sucks it. 5.) I love hot tea at 10 PM.
1.) The fact that last night, I purchased the following mini dress (and, I've always wanted a mini dress, mind you.) in this lovely paisley print in order to ease the stress that comes with transitioning from winter to spring because, its a swell stress reliever. Hey! I bought it to better myself, 'kay? ;-) 2.)Whenever my kitchen is stocked with scrumptious apples, grapes, pears, and other miscellaneous fruit stuffs to add to my vanilla yogurt as a delicious alternative to a great big piece of cake. 3.)The fact that my cat woke me this morning by snoring at an incredible sound level for a cat and, in my drowsiness, allowing that dream I was having to continue ever so slightly into the first few seconds of consciousness because, he sounded so similar to a male of the human persuasion. 4.)In all seriousness, my therapy sessions and the fact that I've finally kicked myself in the ass enough times to return to them on a regular basis because, although I often do not want to go that day, when I leave, I'm ever so glad I went. 5.)Taking walks on days that are fairly decent for such an activity with my IPod blasting in my ears, causing me to speed walk to the beat.
And number 4:
1.)The satisfaction I feel as I close the cover of a book that I've just finished. 2.) The excitement and joy of choosing what I would like to read next. 3.)I know its bad but, I love cracking my knuckles. It feels good, I can't help it. 4.)Every time someone is surprised by my taste in well, everything. 5.) Waitress , (2007); and Andy Griffith portraying a dirty minded, lovable old curmudgeon of a man.
my tastes are eclectic, to say the least.
I love the 40s and 50s, pre-code Hollywood, Broadway, crooners and songbirds, day dressses and red lips and nails; everything Grandma misses, I prefer.
Lucille Desiree Ball has saved me from the throngs of death. She's constantly on my television and in my heart.
I would love to get to know as many of you incredible people as I can. I've been an incessant blog reader/lurker for awhile now but, expect that to change dramatically as I allow my thoughts and opinions to pour forth without inhibitions on this, my baby blog, and in comments throughout the blogosphere.
I hope you won't mind. :-)
If any of you might like to get to know me better; if I spark your interest, or you perhaps, find me endearing (!!, please feel free to take a look at and friend request my personal MySpace or, if you prefer, my Twitter .
